Photo taken in Oslo, Norway
The Classic Adventure
There is something thrilling about venturing out on your own for the first time. A rush of feelings can take over as you step into new ground you’ve never seen before.
Whether it’s adrenaline, trepidation, intrigue, or excitement, the mix of inner sensations with the impressions of a new environment can overwhelm the senses. These are the classic sensations of adventure—the kind found in stories, real or imagined, that can be both tantalizing and terrifying.
We can encounter these adventures at any age. For a child, it might be entering a new school. For an adult, it might be moving to a new city or country.
Something primal stirs as we navigate unfamiliar territory and search for a way through. Perhaps the most unnerving part is the fear of getting lost or stranded as a result of our own decisions.
With every action comes a choice. Along with the fear of losing direction comes the sting of shame.
It’s common to feel ashamed of losing our way. We may even look back with disdain and call them mistakes. But is there no purpose in mistakes?
Do we not learn from the moments we fail? Perhaps these lessons become markers, helping us retrace our steps and understand what we need to move forward.
The Gift of Crisis
At some point, we become immersed in the desire to experience all life has to offer. We decide to take on the world with an energetic drive to explore, experiment, and expand.
For many, this happens during our teens and twenties. We seek stories and adventures to carry with us—memories to look back on for years.
From parties to living abroad to traveling the world, we wear our scars with pride—souvenirs of our mishaps and reminders of the ways we lived.
During this time, we are learning, failing, and becoming all at once. We explore and express ourselves to understand our roles and identities.
Eventually, we sense something is missing. A crisis may be what reveals it. We start to seek self-esteem rooted in something deeper than experience.
It can feel like a voice telling us to come back home—back to ourselves. In Carry On, Warrior, Glennon Doyle writes:
“You have been offered the gift of crisis. As Kathleen Norris reminds us, the Greek root of the word crisis is ‘to sift,’ as in, to shake out the excesses and leave only what’s important. That’s what crises do. They shake things up until we are forced to hold on to what matters most. The rest falls away.”
Four Stages of Life
In time, the lessons of our past become clearer. Mark Manson describes four stages of Life: mimicry, self-discovery, commitment, and legacy.
Mimicry begins in childhood, when we learn rules, seek validation, and figure out how to behave.
Self-discovery is when we experiment, make mistakes, and discover what makes us unique, including our boundaries and values.
Then comes the commitment stage, when we narrow our focus. We commit to relationships, work, or causes that matter to us. We refine our skills and channel them in a purposeful direction.
Finally comes legacy—a stage where we reflect on what we’ve built and what we’ll leave behind.
For those seeking purpose, commitment is the turning point. It’s the time to move from broad exploration to depth. To do so, we must first define our values—the principles that guide who we are and where we’re going.
The Importance of Values
Values are the beliefs that guide our lives. They influence how we behave and interact with others.
We form them through our background, experiences, and the people we surround ourselves with. They shape decisions in every part of life—work, home, relationships, and our place in society.
They define what matters most and who we hope to become. Common values include growth, productivity, individuality, and generosity.
We can find ours by reflecting on what matters most: What inspires you? Who do you admire and why? What brings you joy?
By focusing on values that spark positive emotions, we identify what’s essential. From there, we make choices and habits that align with them.
As we practice living by them, even in challenges, we strengthen focus, discipline, and purpose. This is when the commitment stage comes to life.
The world-renowned and beloved Gandhi once said:
“Your beliefs become your thoughts. Your thoughts become your words. Your words become your actions. Your actions become your habits. Your habits become your values. Your values become your destiny.”
The Signposts of Our Lives
When we live by our values, we strengthen our confidence, clarity, and sense of fulfillment. Our choices feel aligned, and our relationships deepen.
We begin to trust ourselves. We act with purpose. And we feel more present in the everyday moments that shape our lives.
Instead of following distractions or social expectations, we move with intention. We choose the path that feels true to who we are—not just the one that looks good from the outside.
Values become our compass. They lead us back to what matters, even when we feel lost. They help us create lives filled with creativity, gratitude, and meaning.
No matter how far off track we feel, we can always return to them. We carry the signposts of our path—ready to point the way the moment we choose to go inward, and finally, come home.
